By Our Love

"By this all people will know you are my disciples, if you have love for one another." John 13:35 ESV

• Over 2 weeks of meals from people I only met a few months ago
• Phone calls just to check in
• A yummy dessert showing up in my fridge just because
• Friends dropping in to shower me and the kids with gifts 
• A trip out for a pedicure and a nice meal
• Packs of diapers
• Loads of barely used baby clothes, equipment and gadgets from a few new friends
• People sitting with us at the hospital as we waited results of frightening tests

• People we know and some we don't all praying for healing
• Encouraging notes reminding us we are not alone
• A sweet "Welcome Home" banner for the new baby
  
• A 5,000 mile trip to say hi, pray over us, bring supplies, walk our streets, and love on our people.   

• 2 hours, once a week when we share our burdens, pray for one another, laugh and study the Word together.  

• Neighbors sharing toys with my babies 

• Sweet fellowship and community right outside on my porch
• Sitting for hours having coffee, talking about struggles, fears, failures and victories in Christ
• Packages that cost a ridiculous amount of money to send but give the gift of familiarity
• A gift card and a babysitter so I can go on a date with my husband
• Someone who stops and listens to our story of life in Macedonia
• An offer to pray, give and support our work in any way possible from little old ladies that we have never met before. 
• A big hug from every member of a ladies church group saying, I have been praying for you and your family every single day for 3 years.  (WOW!)
• Gift cards for gas and groceries
• Meals with old friends
• New people signing up to pray for us 
• People who don't ask what we need, they just bring it
• A fb message that says, "I love you and I am praying."
• A room full of sold-out believers, singing at the top of our lungs in worship to our Savior

The Body of Christ is amazing.  The love that has been shown to us over the last few months and years is incredible and I am so very thankful that our Heavenly Father has put people in our lives who have been willing to get their hands dirty with us, pray for us, worship with us and support us in ways that can only be inspired by the Lord. Were the world to look in on how you have loved us, they would know we are disciples of Christ. They would know we are bound together in love. They would know that we are family. Thank you for bearing with us as beloved brothers and sisters. We are so blessed and we love you!

Great Post

"Sometimes I don’t want people to tell me that I’m going on a great adventure or that I’m so lucky or brave. Sometimes it just doesn’t feel that way.  Sometimes I feel like I was dragged into this kicking and screaming, with big alligator tears, feeling like everything I have ever known or loved is being stripped away from me and my children. " --'When She's Not the Good Missionary'

I love THIS POST!!!.  I have never met the author, but I love her. She hit the nail on the head and said what I have wanted to say so many times, but she did it so much better than I ever could have.  Please take a minute (or three) and read it.

Sometimes I feel exactly like this. Sometimes I have to grieve the losses even after 7 years.  Sometimes I don't. Sometimes I am beside myself with joy at the privilege of living this life. But one thing remains the same, I always need prayer. My babies always need prayer. And it always makes me feel good to hear, "I'm praying for you." So church, pray for those mommas and their babies scattered all over this world who are sharing the good news of Jesus. They may just be having a rough day.

You can read her follow up post here.

Throwback Thursday

3 years ago, on a beautiful, albeit chilly, spring morning, we baptized 3 new believers

What a glorious day!

Pray that they will continue to grow in the love and knowledge of the Lord and that the Lord will use them in mighty ways among their own people.

Introducing...

Isaiah Hunter 

born on April 23rd at 1:15 A.M. after a wild and crazy day

weighing 8lbs 12oz

and 21.25 inches long.

He was intricately woven together, made in the image of God.

He is loved unconditionally by His Maker

Who has ordered his steps, both big and small.

He is loved by his mommy and daddy

and his big brother and big sister.

And he is ready to see the world. 

Their First Fight

It was over a week ago. It was the middle of the night. I woke up feeling those tinges of pain that mean, "It is time." I was annoyed--I love my sleep, but I was excited.  If you have been around me for any duration of this pregnancy, you know I was ready to have this baby about 2 months ago.  I started timing contractions and waited a few hours to wake up Brian. Once I decided it was for real, I woke up the man and hopped in the shower.  Brian called his mom to come sit with the kids.  A few miles down the road,  the contractions started to wane a little.  Little did I know, this was going to be the norm of the day and a norm I would end up being grateful for.

We went through all the hoops at the hospital to check on the status labor, and while I was having contractions and would be considered "officially in labor," the doctor said it would be a while and gave me the option of leaving and coming back once things picked up a bit more. I was all about hanging at the hospital for the day, but we found out that Thomas was sick... still sick. So we decided since it was the fourth day in a row of him not feeling well and it only seemed like he was getting worse, we would leave the hospital take him to the doctor and maybe by that time, it would be time to meet Isaiah.

We picked up a very lethargic, very sick little boy from grandma and grandpa's and hurried to the pediatrician. I sat in the backseat with him and caught the throw up in a bag while having contractions.  I kind of laughed and muttered to Brian, "This is Thomas and Isaiah's first fight for mommy's attention." Little did I know, this was going to be the norm of the day.

The pediatrician saw us immediately and kind of freaked out a little when they heard I was in labor.  "We don't deliver babies here. I mean, we can, but we don't want to have to."  Well, people what do you want me to do???  The doctor was very concerned about Thomas and threw out a whole list of things that could be wrong, including spinal meningitis. She said we needed to go straight to WakeMed Children's Emergency for a long line of tests and to start fluids.  Things just got (even more) serious. She assured me that they do deliver babies at WakeMed (my hospital and OB were at the hospital on the other side of Raleigh), so we should be ok.

We got back in the car.  I was in pain and on the edge of tears. Brian was making that face, that face I have only seen him make a few times in our marriage. It says, "I don't understand. Why? How? I can make sense of most everything, but not this." Our little wild man was sick... really sick, and we were scared.

On the way to the hospital, I reassumed my position of catching throw up and breathing through contractions. It took forever to get there.  Once there, they hurried us back and started fluids. They put us in a secure room to keep the other patients safe in case it was, in fact, meningitis.

We talked Thomas through getting his IV put in and prayed that God would heal his little body and work everything for His glory. Our little guy was brave and the littlest guy was still knocking on mommy's door.  Somebody needed a time out.

After the CAT scan, spinal tap and a visit from a few different really great doctors, we were told we would be spending the night at WakeMed.  Thomas was a little drunk from his spinal tap (praise the Lord they sedated him) and made his mommy laugh which was a gift delivered at exactly the right time.   Isaiah was still vying for mommy's attention and was not backing down.

The Lord sent special friends to sit with us during this experience, and thanks to the gift of instant message, a whole slew of people were praying.  The nurse commented to a friend that I had been so strong through the day.  While I did have a couple of melt-downs, I attribute the strength only to those of you who prayed us through this.  God was faithful to answer your prayers. Thank you!

I went up to labor and delivery triage two times at WakeMed (leaving sweet scared Thomas with people who loved him dearly) and was told that it was still too early. "Come back in a few hours..."  Ok, people I have had two kids, I know what this is supposed to feel like.  I am having this baby today.  But they insisted, I was probably 'just tired' or 'under too much stress.' I was tired. I was under a lot of stress, but I was also HAVING A BABY!!!!

My parents had arrived to stay the night with Thomas while Brian and I had a baby. But we ended up sending them to a hotel since we were told I wasn't progressing. About an hour after they left the hospital, things got ugly. We got Thomas to sleep and Isaiah cranked into high gear.  I tried to go to bed. I was going on about 3 hours of sleep. I was exhausted in every way possible, but the little guy decided mommy wasn't getting any sleep tonight. Thomas had his day, and now it was his turn to have mommy's undivided attention!

Mom and dad headed back to the hospital. Brian grabbed the bags, and Thomas' nurse wheeled me back up to labor and delivery triage. The same security guard who had seen us go in and out two other times didn't ask any questions this time, he just pushed the button and opened the door.  Once through the doors, my previous triage nurse said, "Now, that's a different lady. That's a lady in labor."  I was in labor two hours ago, but now I have past the point of niceties. It may be best if you don't talk anymore, lady."  

So while our sick little Thomas received iv fluids through the night with Granna and Poppa by his side, Isaiah won his mommy's attention and her heart as he entered the world.

I don't know who won the fight for my attention that day.  I think Isaiah may have taken the high road and given into his brother.  But if this is a sign of things to come, I am going to be sending lots more text messages for prayer and I am going to need lots of special friends beside me helping me through the days of raising these two boys.  :)

We are so grateful to all of you who prayed, sent notes, offered to bring coffee and food, and came to love on us. It was a rough day, but the grace of the Father was sufficient, just like always.  He carried us through that day.  The bright bright silver lining is that Thomas is back to himself, going 150% at everything he does (his father's child), and his blood tests, spinal tap and CAT scan all conclude that he is one healthy boy who now has a healthy happy little brother, Isaiah Hunter. To God be the glory! Great things He has done!

So Much Fun

Spring is here, birds are chirping, sun is shining, grass is green and our kids are having a blast in our little neighborhood.  We live in a little culdesac of town homes near the school Brian is attending, and there are tons of kids everywhere. Kate and Thomas have made so many wonderful friends, and I have enjoyed the constant mommy fellowship, which is something I just don't have overseas. It has been wonderful and the Lord has used everyone of these people to bless us and love on us.  We are so thankful!

Yesterday, we celebrated Kate's half birthday. We aren't really those people who celebrate half birthdays, mainly because I forget them (see post below), but this year, we figured it was a great excuse to have some cupcakes and kill some time before Baby comes. Plus, we will be back overseas for her 6th birthday, so this was a way she could celebrate with her new friends in this neighborhood. She was so excited.  

Look at her being a good little Makedonka and serving all of her friends. :)

And as if any normal day playing in the big clean yard with all their new friends wasn't enough, one of the neighbors rolled out the hose and hooked up a sprinkler the other day. My kids were in heaven.  

The other night after I tucked in the kids and prayed with them, I was walking out of their room and Kate asked me to lay down with her. As I laid beside her and smelled her sweet bubblegum toothpaste breath, she told me about how much she loved living here and how much she loved all her friends here. I asked her if she was still excited about going back to Macedonia, thinking that I knew the answer.  Of course she wouldn't be now. She has fallen in love with having a yard and having friends constantly knocking on her door.  To my surprise she said, "Yeh. I still want to go back to Macedonia to live. But I am going to miss my friends here. It would be good to be able to be in both places. I wish we could do that."  God is good. He has given her such a deep love for Macedonia. It really is her home and I am so thankful that while it will be hard for her to say goodbyes in a few months, she has her heart set on home.  May it be a lesson to me.  

Dig In and Remember

I have recently become keenly aware of the fact that I can't seem to remember anything. Blame it on the pregnancy, but in a few weeks, I will have to find something else to blame it on: not sleeping? nursing? raising 3 kids? speaking 2 languages? my open heart surgery from 10 years ago? the blonde hair?  Plain and simple, I have the memory of the rocks in the front yard. I do remember growing up hearing my mom and some of her church friends laughing about how they would forget their head if it wasn't glued on.  I have joined that club. I am jealous of people who can remember every minute detail of their childhood, their college economics class, the sermon from Sunday, the shower earlier that morning and where every single verse is in the Bible.  I know you might be thinking, no such genius exists.  I am here to tell you, they do. I am married to one of them. He has an uncanny ability to remember every conversation, quiet time, sermon, class lecture, historical date, shower, cup of coffee, everything. It's amazing and really rather annoying, especially when that whole "love keeps no record of wrongs" thing comes in.  In a heated moment, I can always say, "I never hold things you've said in the past against you, and you always hold them against me."  That boils down to the fact that he can remember those ugly things I have done in the past and I simply cannot.  In those moments, my inability to remember makes me look more loving and holy, but in my heart of hearts I sure do wish I could remember that ugly thing he said the other day cause I sure would like to hold it against him. :)

I suppose my lack of memory could be the grace of God in some areas of my life, but I do find it terribly aggravating in other areas, like when I desperately want to share with someone a part of the sermon I heard the other day or when my kids say something hysterical or sweet and I can't remember it five minutes later.  And when I have an incredible time with the Lord one morning and I try to tell Brian all about it at lunch, but I just can't remember why it was so good.  I mean, come on, that's ridiculous.  So other than trying to eat more berries, taking fish oil (when I remember) and playing brain games, I have decided to enact a plan to remember what my Heavenly Father is teaching me every day from his word.  Over the years of teaching young believers and seekers overseas, we have implemented a few things to help guide our time with them.  I always found that when I used one of these plans, I remembered the text much better.  So, this week I have determined to use these plans in my daily times with the Lord.  And guess what, I have still remembered what God has been teaching me well into dinner time. :)  I thought there may be one or two of you who have the same problem or who just simply want to get more out of their daily nourishment than just surface stuff. So here is the plan I have started using.  I have run out of time every day and therefore haven't read as long or as much, but I have been filled up as I have dug in in a more intentional way.
So, here you go, I hope it is helpful to you:
1. Grab a journal and a pen.
2.  Make the following notes from your text:

• What are the key words? 
• Who are the key people?
• What commands do you see?
• What promises do you hear?
• What do you learn about God?
• What do you learn about mankind?
• What is the main point of the text?
• What does this mean for me? (The for me won't change depending on the day, decade, stage or life.  It is the application that is always there)
• What does this mean to me? (The to me may change between today and tomorrow, depending on my mood.  But it something I can take with me for today.)

 or use the SPECKA plan (we learned this at training in Richmond 7 years ago):

• Sin to confess
• Promise to claim
• Example to follow
• Command to obey
• Knowledge about God and His character
• Application

So whether you have a hard time remembering your first cup of coffee and time with the Lord or not, I hope this will help you as you grow in Him.  I know it has helped me.

Stay-cation

Last week was spring break for Brian. We had planned on taking a short family vacation out to the western part of the state, but the weather was cold and icky out west. So we decided we would just "Stay-cate." It was so much fun and so good for all of us.

We started off at the Observation Deck at the international airport.  Thomas was amazed at all of the planes and I was amazed at all of the wealthy people boarding their private jets for a trip to what I am sure was some exotic vacation. Kate was fascinated for a little while, but her excitement wavered pretty quick. Thomas was thrilled at all of it the whole time. They have a great outside area with a playground and picnic tables. So we will have to go back once it warms up a little more.  

After the observation deck we grabbed some Bojangles (YUM!) and headed to a great park for a picnic and some hiking which was a blast.  Kate learned all about trail markers and had fun mapping out the way for us all around the park.  We were going to take the kids roller skating, but the place was closed to the general public, so we went bowling instead. We rounded out the day with DD donuts, and a movie at home in our pjs.  So fun!

The second day, we grabbed some breakfast in the car and headed downtown to the kids' museum, Marbles. It was fantastic! The kids had a ball, and Brian and I had a lot of fun too. There are tons of pictures of the festivities:

 Thomas was an ambulance driver.

 They were boat captains.

 Kate was the cutest fire-girl ever!

 They were big bad pirates.

They were architects and construction workers (Brian's favorite part).

This is her Rapunzel tower that she and Brian built.

 They were hockey players.

 They were carpenters.

 And gymnasts.

And so many other things! 

It was a blast and we will definitely be making a trip back before we head back overseas. After the museum, we headed to a different park to do some more hiking, although, there were no trails.  The kids had fun walking around the lake with Brian, finding hiking sticks and trying start a fire with two sticks.  They got some good smoke going, but it was a no-go on an actual fire.  

We took the kids to a pizza buffet for dinner, which thrilled them. As excited as Kate was about free refills on drinks, she was amazed that you could get free refills on pizza. She also found her new favorite pizza--Mac and Cheese pizza (Americans eat weird stuff).

We had so much fun enjoying each other, God's beautiful creation, and a little bit of America.

I Love To Tell the Story

This weekend we had the immense privilege of telling the story of our life in Macedonia.  Brian dressed up in his awesome old-school Macedonian garb, we set up our pictures and trinkets displaying the country, it's people, and culture, turned on some Macedonian background music, and told the story to every person that walked in our room.  Those people want to hear the story and yet, they have limited time and want to hear everyone else's story too, and so we get a small window of their time to tell our story.  This story can't be told in the three to five minute window that most people give you. How on earth can I tell of the culture and religion of our beloved Macedonia, of all the people we have met, of all the conversations we have had, of all the events we have hosted, of ALL that GOD has done... in less than five minutes???

But we try. We try to get it all in. We try to convey our love for those we have had the privilege to walk among for the last 7 years. We try to tell of the hopelessness and immense darkness. We try to explain the miracles we have seen and of all the ways God has glorified Himself. But we always feel like we walk away leaving so much out. I want to chase after people screaming, "I know you are busy, and you probably don't have time right now, but I forgot to tell you about... You've got to hear it all! The full story!"

The full story is beautiful, amazing, life-changing.  The full story is laced in the jewels of the gospel--the grace that changes lives. The full story will lead you to worship.

Were I to film a documentary on all that God has done to shine His light in Macedonia and of all that He has taught me in the process, it would take hours, and let's face it, it wouldn't be a worldwide premiere. There might be a few people outside of my momma who would buy their own copy.  Maybe???

I have a tendency to think no one really cares. I know that is a lie. People care. Those who sent us out and have welcomed us back--they care. Do they care as much as I thought they would? I don't know. What I do know is that it doesn't make my excitement waver. When I sit and think about the story of the last 7 years, a story that started long long before I gave my life to Christ, a story God has been writing since the beginning of time, a story He let me have the privilege of being a part of, I am overwhelmed with fullness of joy, excitement, emotion. If you will look into my world and listen, if you will walk those streets with me and just listen, if you will just sit awhile, have a little Turkish coffee and listen, you will hear grace, mercy, love, a journey of faith, and together we will worship the Creator and Giver of all these things.

I still love to tell the story of Jesus and his love- it extends to me and it extends to Macedonia. And so if you run into me with a Macedonian display in the background, or if you run into me in the cereal aisle, just know I have a beautiful story to tell.  If you know my Jesus, then you probably do too.

'I Love To Tell the Story'

Arabella K. Hankey

I love to tell the story of unseen things above,

Of Jesus and His glory, of Jesus and His love;

I love to tell the story, because I know ’tis true,

It satisfies my longings as nothing else would do.

Refrain:

I love to tell the story,

’Twill be my theme in glory,

To tell the old, old story

Of Jesus and His love.

I love to tell the story, more wonderful it seems

Than all the golden fancies of all our golden dreams;

I love to tell the story, it did so much for me,

And that is just the reason I tell it now to thee.

I love to tell the story, ’tis pleasant to repeat,

What seems each time I tell it more wonderfully sweet;

I love to tell the story, for some have never heard

The message of salvation from God’s own holy Word.

I love to tell the story, for those who know it best

Seem hungering and thirsting to hear it like the rest;

And when in scenes of glory I sing the new, new song,

’Twill be the old, old story that I have loved so long.

Fascinated

The kiddos have been super funny as they have experienced America for the first time in their lives.  Kate's last trip to these ole United States was when she was two years old, and Thomas was a whopping two months old the last time he saw American soil.  At that point, they couldn't comprehend the differences between Macedonia and America. They lived the last three years in a second culture, hearing a second language on a regular basis. Kate learned another language, went to Macedonian preschool, sang their songs, danced their dances and played their games.

Kate's last day in Macedonian preschool before we left.

Kate and Thomas knew mommy as the only Sunday school teacher they ever had, and their Sunday school class was, well, their bedroom.  They knew "church" as the time on Sundays when everyone piles into our house and daddy teaches them about Jesus while mommy wrangles all the kids in the next room.  Church, among TONS of other things, is different in America. In Macedonia, ketchup tastes different, pizza comes with an extra sauce, water often has bubbles in it, kids' meals don't exist, playgrounds are virtually non-existent, cheese is only white. In Macedonia, we eat a lot of cabbage and potatoes and grocery stores have only... food. The grocery store, along with everything else was within walking distance, and we walked everywhere. It was all they knew.  It was normal and comfortable.

To say they have been fascinated by some things in America would be an understatement.  The first little while we were here, they were wide-eyed everywhere we went. Some of their observations being:

• We go everywhere in a car. "People in America don't walk."
• "Grocery stores are huge."
• Walmart and Target blow them away!  "The carts are GIGANTIC!" And they all look the exact same.  Thomas always thinks we are in the Target by our house even if we are hours away. Poor guy always thinks home must be the next stop.
• Free refills had Kate flabbergasted! "You can drink as much as you want, and then go back for more!"  
• "Gas stations are like restaurants and mini-markets and grocery stores all with gas." My eldest thinks Sheetz is the coolest place on earth. Bless!
• "There are real firetrucks here." We have to slow down and wave at every firetruck we see.  Thomas is convinced policemen and firemen are the heroes of the world and they save us from ALL the bad guys! I love it!
• "Church is SO big! And we have teachers that sing and teachers that talk and teachers that play." They love going to "school" on Sundays.  

This is poor Thomas getting over jet-lag. He was passed out like this for hours while all his cousins ran around him wide-open.  

The kiddos with their Granna and Poppa after celebrating Christmas American style.

Kate and her grandma doing their favorite thing together--baking. 

Grandpa teaches Thomas all about the game of golf.

We are so thankful for this time for them to experience American culture and to spend precious time with family. They have lots of friends to play with right outside our door. There is Sunday school (aka SummitKids) to reinforce what mommy and daddy have been teaching them at home (LOVE it!). And they have fallen in love with Chick-Fil-A chicken (the playground may have something to do with it). :) You know, the important things in life. 
But Kate misses her Macedonian friends.  She said "Why does everyone at daddy's school and everyone at my school know about Jesus, but my friends in Macedonian don't know about Jesus?"  We explained that no one had told her friends in Macedonia yet and that is why God wanted us to live there.  She said, "We have to pray for them and go back and I will show them my new Bible and I will tell them about Jesus."  I love her heart, and I love that God is making her ready to get back 'home' to boldly tell others about the love of Jesus.

Kate with two of her best friends in Macedonia. Be praying for all those kiddos that Kate loves and misses so much!

Reverse Culture Shock

If you haven't figured it out yet, we are back in America.  Our stateside assignment started the end of December which means we made it back to the states just in time to enjoy Christmas with our families, which was wonderful!!!  We have been back a little over a month and within that month we have been able to check out almost every one of our favorite American restaurants, hit up the clearance racks (how I have missed thee), see a couple of movies, worship with our body of believers several times (So incredibly wonderful!!!), enjoy the bounty of the superstore, and go through reverse culture shock.

Every time I think about it, I laugh at myself. I made it about 6 days before culture shock smacked me in the face and had me in tears.  Brian was sick, and I had gone out to navigate these wide, well-marked roads in search of the key to the apartment where we would be staying and food-- an easy enough task, right?! But that day, I might as well have been foraging through the New World with an axe in hand on the back of a donkey trying to find my way through the desert in search of food, water and shelter. I was a mess. At one point I had to call my dad to figure out how to start the van we are driving.  I couldn't get the key out of the ignition. I couldn't turn the ignition. I couldn't do anything.  My daddy asked me what seemed like an overwhelming amount of questions about the steering wheel and tried to comfort me with a story about this same thing happening to my 80 year old grandmother once. I'm not senile... Turns out, all I had to do was put the car in park and then everything worked just fine.  Good grief.  I laughed it off as a "blonde" moment, got off the phone and fussed about this country being so doggone complicated.  The van doors open with buttons, and they didn't seem to want to work for me that day.  Had I forgotten how to push a simple button in order get the results I wanted?!  I pushed the buttons. I tried brute strength, aka pull the door as hard as you can. It wouldn't move.... About the time I started to call my dad to ask him what I knew would turn out to be an obvious answer, the thing worked, and I was able to close the door and head on my way.  I was beginning to hate this land of the free. I didn't feel free. I was enslaved to a mini-van door.  I just wanted to go back to the land of "I (basically) know how everything works..."

And then came the journey for food.  The grocery store kind of made me want to throw up.  While I was excited about loading cheddar cheese, peanut butter and soft sliced bread into my cart, I couldn't seem to come up with an answer as to why there are 492 different boxes of cereal and 847 different variations of food... for dogs???  Once I got my groceries loaded in the car, and managed to get the car door shut, I thought I was deserving of some Chick-fil-A.  So, in hopes of returning to a bit of sanity and reminding myself why I do love this country, I headed for some yummy Christian chicken.  It didn't work.  I missed my Macedonia and no amount of chicken, waffle fries, or free refills was going to make it better.  It was time to get on a plane and head back home.  I called Brian in tears. Bless his sick little heart. He talked me down and managed to make part of his sick day a counseling session for his crazy wife. I made it through that day and the next. And I am happy to say that while I still have no idea why there are 847 variations of dog food and while I still have hard time in the cereal aisle, I can get the doors open on the mini-van on the first try almost every time and most days, I remember to put the car in park before I turn off the car.  I do love my America, but my heart still longs for Macedonia, the simple!

Reverse culture shock is no joke, people. It is painful and lonely much like the culture shock you go through on the other side of the pond, but in my estimation, it can be worse.  Reverse culture shock has you going in, well, reverse. The language, cultural taboos, greetings, slang, pop culture, etc., are all new or in some cases old, and you have to rewind and learn or relearn them or risk looking like a fool in front of your own people.  Overseas, you can chalk up your silly cultural blunders to the fact that you are a foreigner.  In America, not so much. You don't look like a foreigner, you don't talk like a foreigner.  So why on earth would you take your shoes off at someone's door and kiss them three times on both cheeks when you meet them???  Cause it cultural... somewhere.
It was the sheer grace of God that got me through culture shock overseas and sustained me there every day, and it is the grace of God that gets me through reverse culture shock and sustains me here as well.   I need thee every hour, O precious Lord...

For my colleagues and fellow expatriates out there here's a little navigational guide for reentry into what we once called home:
1. Check your expectations at customs. That basically sums it up, but if you want specifics, read on...
2. America is busy, therefore Americans are busy. They will have to work you into their schedule, and after about a week, you will have to do the same. Don't be offended or hurt. It's just how things operate around here.
3. You will need a calendar and you will need to actually use it. Deep breaths everyone.
4. If texting isn't your main form of communication, you will need to figure it out and quick.
5. You will get laughed at.  That sense of humor that got you through language school and cultural learning overseas will need to be back in full swing over here.  You must laugh at yourself.
6.  Church will overwhelm you. It may overwhelm you in a different way than it did me.  Our church is large and wonderful, tons of people, and yet little interaction with anyone on Sunday mornings.  Coming from house church where everyone just sits around and loves on one another for hours after worship, this was hard for me, which leads me to my next point...
7. Plug into a small group or SS class.  Our small group is wonderful and that is where we have found community and fellowship. It is a must!
8. The temptation to judge and be critical is huge. Don't give in.  Give grace.  Share truth, humbly and in love.
9. Do something fun.  Show your kids and remind yourself the great fun that can be had in America. Go see a movie, enjoy some over-priced coffee and doughnuts, go play with all the new toys at Best Buy and in the toy aisle at Walmart, sing the national anthem at the top of your lungs, go to a ball game, walk around a park, spend some precious time with extended family and take lots of pictures of the festivities. Just enjoy yourself.
10. Remember home is heaven.  Home isn't here or there.  Home is upward.  The longing that can't be satisfied overseas or upon return isn't meant to be. It will only be satisfied when we are with our Jesus, face to face in heaven.  We know this. We preach it, and yet, we can so quickly forget it.

Stay-tuned for the kids' perspective on America, and let us know if you want to get together. We are here till the summer and we would LOVE to meet up for a coffee!

My Tiny Little Baby... A Precious Life

It was 13 years ago. One of my best friends in high school had gone through with it.  I called that morning to check on her, and I literally fell to my knees as her mother said, 'She can't come to the phone. She is resting from the procedure." I got off the phone and cried for most of the day.  I had begged her to give me her unborn baby.  I had promised her I would be by her side the whole time.  My heart was broken.  The tragedy of abortion hit me square in the face.  It was no longer a far off tragedy. It was personal.  It had effected my dear friend and her future generations.

This past Sunday was sanctity of life Sunday here in America, and while I sat in church on Sunday morning and listened to the facts about this destroyer of life that is legal in our country, I felt my precious little one moving around inside of me.  I fought back tears, and I literally felt sick to my stomach. I couldn't imagine not giving this precious baby boy the chance at life.  Last week, I went in for an ultrasound of my little man.  I saw his eyes, his nose, his fingers and little toes. Along with my ultrasound technician, I praised the Father over the miracle that is this little one.  His little heart beat strongly as I strained to see into his world, his safe haven.  He is alive, moving, active, growing, and I will do everything to care for him and protect him for as long as his heart beats.  He is being intricately woven together, created in the image of God.  He is precious and loved by his creator. 

My five and three year old understand that there is a living baby inside mommy and that they have to be careful not to hurt him. They understand that mommy has to be careful with what she does because she wants to take care of this little one God has given us, and yet some of the most educated people in the world would have us believe that if I wanted to harm him, to stop his heart, it would be ok because he is living in my body. Over 50 million little lives have been killed in the U.S. alone because many women have given into the lie that they are more important than the baby inside their womb.  

To those women, including my friend from high school, you are precious and loved in the eyes of your Creator. There is grace and forgiveness through the blood of Jesus. He longs to be your comforter as you face the pains of your decision.  He is holding your little one safely in His arms. Put your trust in Him. Give Him your life and He will give you beauty for your ashes of mourning.

America, you are my beloved country, but we have walked down a path for 40 years that is wrong and against the One who endows us with those very inalienable rights that we cling to so fiercely and that we use to excuse this tragedy.  We must turn our face back toward Him in humble submission. We must stop killing His little creations who have never gotten the chance to take their first breath.  

Look at that face and tell me you aren't willing to do whatever it takes to keep it safe.

For more on this topic, here are some fantastic links: 

I rest my own motherly grief in the grace of Christ who holds my worshiping little Victoria Elise who would be 22 years old now.  How great a grace of a savior that lets a woman who added to the number of the 55 million be a part of saving hundreds!  
http://firstchoicepregnancysolutions.blogspot.com/2013/01/what-can-you-do-on-day-marking-40-years.html 

"Many simply say it is the lesser of two evils. I took an abortionist out to lunch once, prepared to give him ten reasons why the unborn are human beings. He stopped me, and said, “I know that. We are killing children.” I was stunned. He said, “It’s simply a matter of justice for women. It would be a greater evil to deny women the equal right of reproductive freedom.” Which means women should be no more encumbered by the consequences of an unplanned pregnancy than men. That equal freedom from the burden of bearing unwanted children is the basis for abortion that President Obama refers to again and again when he talks about equal rights for women. We know we are killing children."
http://www.desiringgod.org/blog/posts/we-know-they-are-killing-children-all-of-us-know 

"But the “personhood” debate is looking more and more like an irrelevant discussion. As an example, take Merle Hoffman, a key figure for the pro-choice movement, who founded one of the first abortions clinics even prior to 1973. She notes that most people who get abortions acknowledge that the fetus is a tiny human life, with fingers and toes and a heartbeat. But that fact was outweighed by their decision: “They knew [the fetus was a human life], but my patients who made the choice to have an abortion also knew they were making the right one, a decision so vital it was worth stopping that heart.”

   -----Spence Shelton at http://www.jdgreear.com

And even a free book by John Piper on the topic: Exposing the Dark Work of Abortion